Resolved Question
How do girls feel about guys who don't fight?
I don't fight, ever. No matter
what somebody does or says to me I can just never get angry enough to
actually physically do something about it. I'm sure if somebody actually
attacked me I would fight back but otherwise I would never get in
someone's face or throw the first punch.
Do girls need a guy who is violent like that or would you rather have a guy who avoids conflict for the sake of both parties? I'm not a looser, I'm a nice guy, intelligent, good-looking and I'm not some boring nerd weakling. I'm just not a fighter and it's obvious, I'm just a really gentle guy. How do women feel about that in a guy?
Do girls need a guy who is violent like that or would you rather have a guy who avoids conflict for the sake of both parties? I'm not a looser, I'm a nice guy, intelligent, good-looking and I'm not some boring nerd weakling. I'm just not a fighter and it's obvious, I'm just a really gentle guy. How do women feel about that in a guy?
Additional Details
The
reason I worry about this is because I've been called a pussy by
countless people for not starting a fight in situations where other
people would. Like if a dude called my GF a name or if somebody was
picking on me in high school. Why do people feel that it's a requirement
for every guy to be angry and violent?
Honestly
it's not because I have much of a moral block telling me I shouldn't
fight. It's because I'm scared, so many things could go wrong like
people die from getting punched in the face the wrong way, what if he
pulls a knife or I hit my head and get brain damage? How to people fight
without thinking about these possibilities?
Best Answer
I think you are just a
laid back guy, which is cool. You prefer to be peaceful with everyone,
and that is something to be appreciated. There are some women who
appreciate a guy like you, and I am one of them, because I am the same
way.
To be honest, every woman, just like every man, is different. There are some women who prefer the rough/tough guy/bad boy/thug type, and then there are those, who want a man to love and accept them for who they are without expecting them or trying to make them change who they are. Women love a man who is assertive, one who will stand up for himself and her, when it is needed, and not one who is aggressive in terms of being violent, and clearly, there is a difference between the two.
There is a way to handle conflict within a relationship. Both parties have to fight fair. If the issue is one person being late, while the other person likes to be punctual for events and dates, then stick to the issue, and not make personal attacks on each other, because let's face it, you can and may win the battle, but lose the war and the relationship in the end.
I think it is great that you are gentle and truthfully, we need more men like you. It is sad that some women do not recognize a good man when they have him or when they see him, but the same could be said of men, who do not recognize a good woman when they have her or when they see her.
Concerning the latter, I have experience in this area. I dated a guy (long term on/off again relationship), and was faithful, loving, sweet, kind, and gentle. To make a long story short, instead of telling up front that he longer wanted to date me, he put me through all kinds of bull crap. In the end, he said that he wanted a date a woman who was "bitchy" and I did not fit that for him. As far as I am concerned, that is his loss and I am getting on with my life, and waiting for the right person to come into my life.
I would say focus on being who you are, and living your life, and know that in due time, the right woman will come into your life and will appreciate you for who you are, and knows that you are worth more than your weight in gold..
Hope this helps..
To be honest, every woman, just like every man, is different. There are some women who prefer the rough/tough guy/bad boy/thug type, and then there are those, who want a man to love and accept them for who they are without expecting them or trying to make them change who they are. Women love a man who is assertive, one who will stand up for himself and her, when it is needed, and not one who is aggressive in terms of being violent, and clearly, there is a difference between the two.
There is a way to handle conflict within a relationship. Both parties have to fight fair. If the issue is one person being late, while the other person likes to be punctual for events and dates, then stick to the issue, and not make personal attacks on each other, because let's face it, you can and may win the battle, but lose the war and the relationship in the end.
I think it is great that you are gentle and truthfully, we need more men like you. It is sad that some women do not recognize a good man when they have him or when they see him, but the same could be said of men, who do not recognize a good woman when they have her or when they see her.
Concerning the latter, I have experience in this area. I dated a guy (long term on/off again relationship), and was faithful, loving, sweet, kind, and gentle. To make a long story short, instead of telling up front that he longer wanted to date me, he put me through all kinds of bull crap. In the end, he said that he wanted a date a woman who was "bitchy" and I did not fit that for him. As far as I am concerned, that is his loss and I am getting on with my life, and waiting for the right person to come into my life.
I would say focus on being who you are, and living your life, and know that in due time, the right woman will come into your life and will appreciate you for who you are, and knows that you are worth more than your weight in gold..
Hope this helps..
Other Answers
1. The bigger man is always the one who can avoid fight(as long as it's
avoidable) no matter what comes to your face. Getting up after having a
couple of punches and walk away thinking about what you're going to have
for lunch today.
But there will come a time when fists are the ONLY answer. And that's the time you strike back without mercy.
From the girls I've met, they mostly like this type of guy. But it's the hardest one.But there will come a time when fists are the ONLY answer. And that's the time you strike back without mercy.
2. Fighting is stupid. I'd rather a guy avoid conflict and be the bigger man as a person instead of getting pummeled. No one wants to date a door mat but most women aren't looking for a street fighter, either.
There's an episode of LOUIE about this exact subject. The episode is "Bully." Watch it on Netflix.
3. Gosh.. I'v been looking for someone like that for ages.. (i'm not saying we should hook up. i'm not that dumb:P) but honestly, some of us girls like when the guy doesn't fight (and i'm pretty sure a relationship would last longer like that too because you don't get in bad enough fights that you would want to break up).
really. don't stress it!:)
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